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Dear Donna: June 12, 2018

Dear Donna,

I met a lady a month ago and initially I was very excited about her. The first two weeks we saw each other several times a week but she travels with her job and I have not seen her for 10 days. I understand this is a part of her life that I will need to adjust to but I would like more communication from her when she is out of town. I have expressed this to her and she said she will try to do better. She says she is also very excited about getting to know me but her lack of communication when she is out of town makes me wonder if she is as interested in me as I am in her. Steve

Dear Steve,

A month ago you did not even know this person existed and 10 of those days you did not see each other. How excited do you expect her to be at this point? You need to lower your expectations and respect that she is working and she will call you when she can. Go with the flow and leave the ball in her court to call you. That approach will work much better than pushing her to call you and will not make her feel pressured. Wait until she returns and discuss it in person. Try to lighten up, desperation attracts desperation.

Dear Donna,

I am divorced and starting to date again. I am amazed at how many men I have met who have multiple divorces. I have only been married once and I cannot understand how someone can be divorced two, three, four times. I want to eventually be married again but I don’t want to be wife number three, four or five. Should I avoid men who have multiple divorces? Kelly

Dear Kelly,

Unfortunately multiple divorces are very common today. When I got into the dating business 30 years ago if someone was divorced more than once people would wonder what was wrong with that person. The internet changed all that. It has created an environment of serial daters who are always looking for the grass to be greener on the other side. Multiple choices leads to multiple partners, leads to multiple divorces.
You have only been married once so it will feel more compatible to you if a man has also been married just once, but you might be limiting yourself if you eliminate all men who have been divorced more than once. Listen to his story before you make it a show stopper.

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