Donna's Daily Diary - January 19, 2010

My first appointment today is a man, late 50’s, divorced, has a Masters degree, plans to retire at the end of this year, grown children and grandchildren he seems to adore. He is has been divorced for a few years, and has dated a number of ladies but nothing has lasted longer than a few months. He verified my observations about how it takes most people about three months to be relaxed enough to really be themselves. He said “I don’t want to spend another three or four or five months dating someone only to find out they have grown children who are a financial or emotional drain, or in jail. They say they hike, ski, bike but somehow it never happens. They say they are emotionally available and they are not. They want to have sex right away..(yes, ladies it happens to men too). They ask me to help them out financially. They are looking for someone to make them happy when they aren’t happy with themselves. They live more than an hour away.” He has met most of these ladies on internet and is tired of wasting his time. Actually, one of the ladies he met told him about my service and he decided to check it out. When I told him I recommend a one hour meeting for the initial meeting, not lunch or dinner, just a cup of coffee and at the end of the meeting they both agree to “get back to Donna”. He said “I sometimes spent weeks emailing or talking with someone before we would meet and then we would meet and I would know instantly I was not attracted to them (even though he had seen a picture). The situation I found most uncomfortable was telling someone who was interested in me was that I was not interested in them. One hour and “get back to Donna” sounds easy.” AND, if he finds a lady attractive and she can keep up with him, he doesn’t care if she is a few years older than him. Eureka!

My second appointment is a previous client. I worked with this man 12 years ago and he dated a lady I introduced to him for 10 years. It’s over and he is ready to move on. He is late 60’s, educated, tall, thin and, the picture of good health. He runs, hikes, bikes, enjoys theater, concerts, plays, the symphony and likes to dance. I still had his file and I handed him his Ideal Relationship that he wrote 12 years ago. He said he wouldn’t change a word. Once again, it reminds me that what people want in an ideal partner does not really change over time. He thought he had the ideal partner for 10 years but apparently, she thought differently. I have some great matches for him and I look forward to working with him again.

I just had a phone call from a lady who has been with a man in introduced to her a year and a half ago. They got engaged on Christmas day and they are going to get married this summer. She told me they were totally happy and she wanted to share their good news with me. I think they are “Perfectly Matched” and I wish them the best. She surprised me, however, by asking if they were due a refund because they did not use up all their matches. They both purchased 10 matches, he was her fourth match and she was his first. I said “Most of my clients would love to get it right on the first or fourth match and YOU are getting married….No, there is no refund.” She understood. Geezzzzz!